連結‧沉默的情緒覺察:楊壹琳繪畫創作中的圖像閱讀

Abstract

本研究從個人的情緒之於生活事件和週遭事物的連結觀察中出發，探討個體 自身心靈感受對於繪畫創作的啟發，由於自身所選擇的繪畫創作手法需歷時一段 不算少的時間，而期間牽涉了諸多的心靈事件和情感波動的轉換浪潮，情緒的強 度在製作作品的過程中得到了稀釋和弱化，代而為之的是更深沉的自我反思和自 我價值的探尋，若在搜尋的過程中有所斬獲，即吸納進作品自身，不僅從中得以 認同自身、確立自我的處世哲學，這樣逐步的明晰辨識將自我心靈感受的混沌狀 態漸漸洗清和淨化，一如原先的向外探尋和外部連結，到回歸生命之初的自我意 識和生命存在的課題。 透過哲學、心理學和自我感受的思辨，試圖解釋何種形象才是真實？又個體 情緒的真實面貌究竟為何進行思辨，其中也牽涉到主體和「他者」的互動關係， 在情緒的探討議題上，必然會牽涉到「本體感受」之事件的發生，透過個體自身 的替身圖像，將這份感受具現在畫作之中，將自身比擬作畫作中人，而人物本身 的特異形象，即顯現物像所指涉的象徵意涵，畫中人物將作為傷痛事件的寓言， 代替創作者發出情緒的呼救，以期能傳遞到觀者的心靈感受上This research departs from personal feeling on the observations of everyday incidents connecting with surroundings, to investigate the personal inspiration on painting creation process. Since it took quite a while to choose the way for painting creation, during this creation process, the individual involves various thoughts changing and the transforming tides of emotional feeling. The strong of emotional of individual become diluted and weaken during the process of creation, what replaces the original changing thoughts is a deeper sense of self-reflection and the search of self-value. During the search process, the gains will be absorbed into the painting work and also improve the individual’s self-identity and define the life philosophy. This gradually clarification transform the self-individual from the status of chaos to the purity, as the original outward search and connections, backing to the lesson of existence and self-consciousness when the individual was just born. Through the lens of philosophy, psychology, and my personal feeling, I attempt to know which image is real. Also, I am thinking of what underlying the individual emotion, which also relates to the interactions of subject and otherness. On the investigation of emotion issue, inevitably involving with the event of subject’s emotion. By matching self-individual into the character in the painting work, the distinctive image of self-individual will appear as the symbolic meaning, which the image indicated, the dismay fable of painting character will be able to act as the creator himself to express the emotional shouting, and eventually hope to deliver this emotional feeling to the hearts of audience.